Bullying how can i help
Keep the Lines of Communication Open Research tells us that children really do look to parents and caregivers for advice and help on tough decisions.
Start conversations about daily life and feelings with questions like these: What was one good thing that happened today? Any bad things? What is lunch time like at your school?
Who do you sit with? What do you talk about? What is it like to ride the school bus? What are you good at? What would do you like best about yourself? Describe what kids who bully are like. Why do you think people bully? Who are the adults you trust most when it comes to things like bullying?
Have you ever felt scared to go to school because you were afraid of bullying? What ways have you tried to change it? What do you think parents can do to help stop bullying? Have you or your friends left other kids out on purpose? Do you think that was bullying? Look closely. Signs to look out for include: Physical marks such as unexplained bruises, scratches, broken bones and healing wounds Fear of going to school or joining school events Being anxious, nervous or very vigilant Having few friends in school or outside of school Losing friends suddenly or avoiding social situations Clothing, electronics or other personal belongings being lost or destroyed Often asking for money Low academic performance Absenteeism, or calling from school asking to go home Trying to stay near adults Not sleeping well and may be having nightmares Complaining of headaches, stomach aches or other physical ailments Regularly distressed after spending time online or on their phone without a reasonable explanation Becomes unusually secretive, especially when it comes to online activities Being aggressive or having angry outbursts Talk openly.
Talk to your children about what they think is good and bad behaviour in school, in the community and online. It is important to have open communication so that your children will feel comfortable telling you about what is happening in their lives. Responding to bullying. What should I do if my child is being bullied or threatened? If you know your child is being bullied, there are several steps you can take to help them: Listen to your child openly and calmly.
Focus on making them feel heard and supported, instead of trying to find the cause of the bullying or trying to solve the problem. Make sure they know that it is not their fault. Tell the child that you believe them ; that you are glad they told you; that it is not their fault; that you will do your best to find help. Talk to the teacher or school.
You and your child do not have to face bullying alone. Ask if your school has a bullying policy or code of conduct. This may apply for both in-person bullying and online. Be a support system. For your child, having a supportive parent is essential to dealing with the effects of bullying. Make sure they know they can talk to you at any time and reassure them that things will get better. What can I do if my child is bullying others? There are several steps you should take to help your child stop bullying: Communicate.
Understanding why your child is acting out will help you know how to help them. Are they feeling insecure at school?
Does the child have:. These are only a few of the warning signs that indicate that a child is being bullied. Kids rarely show all the same signs.
These are only a few signs that indicate that a kid is engaging in bullying behavior. Most of the time, teachers and staff break up incidents as they occur. This allows the school to fix the situation while preventing it from occurring again. Remember that there are often bystanders, and bystanders frequently encourage and reinforce bullies Mahoney, Once the crowd is split up, get the facts. Interview the bystanders.
When you listen, show empathy. Remember to be nonjudgmental. Get the story from several sources, including the aggressor, the target, and some bystanders US Department of Health and Human Services. Bullying will rarely end right away. Be persistent and consistent about stopping it, follow through with consequences, and follow up with the students after incidents US Department of Health and Human Services.
Show the kids that you really care, and you could become their trusted adult. There are certain places where bullying occurs the most, and these tend to be areas where adults are not likely to often be present — areas like hallways, bathrooms, playgrounds, and busses. When an adult is present, kids feel safer, and bullying behaviors are less likely to occur.
Statistics show that One way to stop behaviors is to have open communication. All staff must work together to keep these spots monitored. The US government also aims to ensure that students have the safest environments possible. All staff should be familiar with their state laws and regulations regarding bullying. The National Center for Mental Health Promotion and Youth Violence Prevention suggests that you find your law, find your district policy, match the law and the policy, educate district leadership on legal responsibilities, and ensure that your policy is being implemented properly.
Train staff, educate parents, and ensure that the whole district is consistent when enforcing its policy US Department of Health and Human Services.
This allows everyone to be on the same page and helps students feel safe. Bullying can be reduced. For more on reducing and stopping bullying, check out 31 Bullying Prevention Difference Makers.
No Thanks. Blog Post Education. Yet with beatings, death threats, and hour harassment via technology, bullying has become a dangerous, life-threatening epidemic. Children cannot get away from it, which has led to many suicides. Schools are struggling to take a stand against bullying, and with parents, politics, and the media involved, educators have a difficult time pleasing everyone.
Have a clear definition of bullying Bullying occurs at all grade levels. Remove labels; address behaviors When teachers and staff call a child a bully or a victim, they place a judgment on that child, which can then cause problems in the future for that student.
Set clear and enforceable rules and expectations Age-appropriate rules allow a student to know what behavior is expected. The authors suggest that staff should: State rules in positive terms, Keep the number of rules to a minimum 3—5 depending upon age , Set rules that cover multiple situations, Make sure rules are age appropriate, Teach your students the rules, Set an example for rule-following behavior, and Be consistent in enforcing the rules.
Have open communication Communication is key to building rapport. Look for warning signs When bullying is occurring, there may be warning signs. Ask yourself these questions: Are you constantly breaking up the same kids? Tell your child the unique qualities you love about him and reinforce positive behaviors that you'd like to see more.
Honoring kids' strengths and encouraging healthy connections with others can affect self-esteem, increase your kids' long-term confidence, and prevent any potential bullying situations. When your child tells you how she defused a harasser, let her know you're proud.
If you witness another child standing up to a bully in the park, point it out to your child so she can copy that approach. Above all, emphasize the idea that your own mom may have told you when you were a kid: If your child shows that she can't be bothered, a bully will usually move on.
Children must understand that bullies have a need for power and control over others and a desire to hurt people. They often lack self-control, empathy, and sensitivity. With that said, it's helpful for children to use these strategies when dealing with bullies:. Ultimately, it's up to parents to help young child deal with a bully. Help him learn how to make smart choices and take action when he feels hurt or see another child being bullied, and be ready to intervene if necessary. If your child is reluctant to report the bullying, go with him to talk to a teacher, guidance counselor, principal, or school administrator.
Learn about the school's policy on bullying, document instances of bullying and keep records, and stay on top of the situation by following up with the school to see what actions are being taken. When necessary, get help from others outside of school, like a family therapist or a police officer, and take advantage of community resources that can deal with and stop bullying. Being an upstander and not a passive bystander means a child takes positive action when she sees a friend or another student being bullied.
Ask your child how it feels to have someone stand up for her, and share how one person can make a difference. This is the right approach only for persistent acts of intimidation, and when you feel these parents will be receptive to working in a cooperative manner with you.
Call or e-mail them in a non-confrontational way, making it clear that your goal is to resolve the matter together. You might say something like:. She tells me that Suzy has called her names and excluded her from games at the playground. I don't know whether Suzy has mentioned any of this, but I'd like us to help them get along better.
Do you have any suggestions? Communicate with your child's school and report bullying incidences. Make them aware of any situations," Kaplan says. Though more schools are implementing bullying prevention programs, many still do not have enough support or resources.
Learn how to start anti-bullying and anti-violence programs within the school curriculum. If your child is being bullied, remind her that it's not her fault, she is not alone, and you are there to help. It's important for kids to identify their feelings so they can communicate what's going on; therefore, parents should talk about their own feelings. What parents shouldn't do, no matter the child's age, is assume that this is normal peer stuff that will work itself out.
Helping your child deal with a bully will build confidence and prevent a difficult situation from escalating. Wait what? This article is telling children how to deal with bullies.
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